Start Spreding Your Cheeks

Okay, so I actually ran out of toilet paper today. I have been in Florida for probably a total of six weeks so far, and I bought one of those big-ass package of toilet paper. I labored under the false impression that it would last forever, and then I just ran out. I am ashamed to admit that I availed myself of the facilities at a nearby hotel this morning and actually thought about stealing some of their paper, but a cooler head prevailed. I hit up the Walgreen’s near me this evening and bought myself what I fear is some cheap-ass toilet paper, but it was right near the front of the store so I took it. I always wondered how we never ran out of toilet paper at home, and now I guess I now know why. Somebody else buys it. I’m thinking that it’s probably the wife, since I’ve never heard of anyone having a toilet paper route before. You learn something new every day.